Remember how most of us used blogs to express our feelings? How afterwards we'd feel that sense of relief once we've let it all out? I think.. today, I might try it. You see, my boyfriend is going to do is National Service tomorrow, he'll be gone for two weeks. I know, you might say two weeks isn't long at all.. but, we've been seeing each other everyday, sleeping with each other side-by-side, lying on his arms. It been a year and four months we've been together. You might call me young and tell me that I wouldn't know what love is like.. but, you see. I have been with different guys ever since the age of 12, I got hurt, I fell down, I got up, I found a new guy and all of this became a cycle, I wasn't used to being alone. It's not that I needed a boyfriend in the beginning, but rather, someone who's just there for me to cry on. I've been brought up from a family that's constantly fighting, arguing, maybe sometimes, comparing. I didn't have that love I've always yearned from my parents thus, leading me to go astray for a few years of my life. In that few years of life that I had, I've began being sexual in a term? I wasn't sexual at all at the beginning but somehow, curiosity just got a hold of me. I didn't have sex till I was forced to, at the age of 14. I regretted it badly, I cried for weeks after he left. At that time afterall, I didn't know what love really was. After this guy, I met this kid who lied about his age in the beginning, he was nice and everything. We went out for about 11 months, and around the 3rd month of out relationship, he changed, he wouldn't let me love him at all, he kept shunning me, pushing me away.
Feeling sad, I called out to the guy (who is currently now my boyfriend) to make me feel better, to talk to me. We started talking and everything, he kept dropping little hints at me saying stuff like, "If I was your boyfriend, I'd definitely treat you better." and you know what? He did. He fulfilled his promise. He wasn't exactly a boyfriend to me. He wasn't exactly, 100% a lover to me at all, he's best friend. Which guy would lie down beside you, look at you and cry together? Maybe even sing together? or even laugh at stupid trivial matters. Needless to say, he's the best. The guy that I'd like to marry, the guy that I would not like to leave behind. He may be clingy sometimes and all but I guess that's a good part of him. He's lovely, full of surprises. He may be gone for two weeks starting as of tomorrow but, he wont be there to lie beside me and do all of those stuff. He wont be there to make me smile repeatedly for two weeks. I'll miss him, I'll really do. You were mine, ever since 24th August 2010. You're awesome, you're really sweet. Please stay this way, forever making me happy.
Feeling sad, I called out to the guy (who is currently now my boyfriend) to make me feel better, to talk to me. We started talking and everything, he kept dropping little hints at me saying stuff like, "If I was your boyfriend, I'd definitely treat you better." and you know what? He did. He fulfilled his promise. He wasn't exactly a boyfriend to me. He wasn't exactly, 100% a lover to me at all, he's best friend. Which guy would lie down beside you, look at you and cry together? Maybe even sing together? or even laugh at stupid trivial matters. Needless to say, he's the best. The guy that I'd like to marry, the guy that I would not like to leave behind. He may be clingy sometimes and all but I guess that's a good part of him. He's lovely, full of surprises. He may be gone for two weeks starting as of tomorrow but, he wont be there to lie beside me and do all of those stuff. He wont be there to make me smile repeatedly for two weeks. I'll miss him, I'll really do. You were mine, ever since 24th August 2010. You're awesome, you're really sweet. Please stay this way, forever making me happy.
I love you, Aason Ong.
With Love,
Stacey ♥